On elevating the discourse

Dear readers,

As a legitimate and devoted journalist, I would be remiss if I did not correct a factual error in my letter to the Los Angeles Archdiocese earlier this week. All of the 500 victims of the clergy's penises are not receiving the same monetary compensation, as I originally wrote. Instead, they will be payed varying amounts based on the severity of the raping and the length of time the raping lasted. Also, twelve of the original plaintiffs in the class action suit have died of suicide or alcohol abuse since filing their complaints, so their share of the loot will be skimmed off the top.

I apologize for any inconvenience caused to the Archdiocese.

Speaking of legitimate journalism and ridiculous religiosity, I came upon an insightful interview conducted by Mr. Ian Murphy of The Beast with Ken Ham, president of Answers in Genesis, the creationist museum. I know first-hand how difficult it is to gain access to Mr. Ham, so I commend Ian Murphy on this impressive "get".